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MollersDownUder

MollersDownUder

In late 2007 my wife and I, together with our three children pulled up our roots from South Africa and migrated half way around the world to settle in Australia. I started this blog to share with the people back home in South Africa, some of the experiences that I have had (always to be taken with a pinch of salt).

Each story is posted twice - a version written in my native Afrikaans and a translated English version.
   
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Ontmoet vir Koda

4 March 2012 15:17 15
Ek het onlangs nog ‘n Facebook “gesprek” met my sussie gehad, sy bly iewers op ‘n plaas in Mpumalanga. Volgens Google Maps is ons presies 11535.39 km ver uit mekaar, soos die kraai sou vlieg (sou 'n pretty damn impressive kraai moet wees!). Dus is dit nie moontlik vir ons om sommer gou oor en weer te kuier nie so probeer ons maar om via Facebook op te vang met die nuus. Hierdie laaste keer vra sy my toe hoe dit gaan met ons, of meer spesifiek met my, met die Minister van Finansies en Huishoudelike Sake en ook ons spruite. Ek het die nodige verslag aan haar verskaf, maar besef toe dat sy nooit oor Koda, die vier-voetige lid van die gesin, se welsyn uitgevra het nie. Dit was vir my ‘n saak van kommer. Ek het dadelik besef dat ek die sakie daar en dan sou moes aanspreek alvorens dit ‘n tendens begin raak, en het toe met streng beslistheid opgetree, dog met liefde. 
Ek sal erken dit was nie vir my maklik nie. Ek praat nou nie van my optrede om haar blatante nalatigheid aan te spreek nie, nee ‘n man doen maar wat ‘n man moet doen. Wat moeilik was, was die feit dat ‘n lid van jou gesin so blatant uitgelaat word. Daar is maar baie emosies wat dan deur ‘n mens woel as so iets gebeur. Ek het dit eers probeer ontken, en later voel ek diep geskok. Dit was toe gevolg deur hartseer gebrokenheid, daarna word ek toe kwaad, en toe is daar net stille aanvaarding. Ek troos my daaraan dat ek die saak aangespreek het en glo dat dit nie weer sal gebeur nie. Dis met daardie gedagte dat ek tot die besef gekom het dat julle, my gereelde lesers, nog nooit ‘n formele kennismaking met Koda gehad het nie (behalwe miskien ‘n vlugtige ontmoeting in my Australian Corporate Games blog inskrywing). Dit sal dus niks minder as reg wees nie, dat ek hom nou aan julle bekend stel. Hierdie blog gaan immers oor ons lewens hier in Australië en Koda maak deel uit daarvan. 
Koda het in ons lewens gekom kort na ons Queensland toe getrek het. Ons het die troeteldier ding in Melbourne probeer in die vorm van goudvissies en budgies, maar kom ons sê maar net dinge het nie so lekker uitgewerk vir hulle nie. Na ek en die Minister van Finansies en Huishoudelike Sake die sakie in detail bespreek het, belowe ons toe die spuite dat ons ‘n brak sal kry sodra ons op die Gold Coast gevestig is, tot groot opgewondenheid van die kroos. As dit by honde kom is ek nie te veel gepla nie. Daar is egter twee kriteria waaraan die brak sou mos voldoen, naamlik: 
een: Hy/sy moet ‘n hond wees:Daar is baie diere wat foutiewelik as ‘honde’ geklassifiseer word, soos Poedels, Shih Tzu’s en Worsies. Hulle tel nie. Hulle blaf dalk – in die geval van Worsies, heeltemal te veel – en hulle het almal miskien sterte, maar moenie deur hierdie fasade geflous word nie. Nee wag, voor julle nou almal op my spring met lasterlike opmerkings, ek sê vir geen oomblik dat hierdie wolle bolletjies nie oulik is nie, hulle is (behalwe die worsies natuurlik). My beskeie opinie is net dat hulle nie as ‘honde’ geklassifiseer kan word nie. Nee, ‘n regte hond is iets soos ‘n Alsatian of ‘n Labrador. Niks kleiner nie. Daar is egter een uitsondering, naamlik ‘n Jack Russel.
twee: Hy/sy moet nie die bankrekening ‘n groter beroerte gee as was reeds ondervind was met die trek Queensland toe nie:
Hierdie punt elimineer toe outomaties alle opregte honde, telers en troeteldierwinkels. Die opsie wat dus oorgebly het, was om ‘n draai te gaan maak by die Animal Welfare League om ‘n brakkie aan te neem wat ‘n huis soek. Min het ek geweet dat die begroting in elk geval sou hoes, want dis hok en kos en mat en waterbak en kosbak en inspuitings en stadsraad liksens en leiband en borsel en anti-wurm goeters en anti-vlooi goeters en nog wat. Maar ek kon mos nie nou op die 11de uur terug gaan op my belofte nie. Kan jy jou nou indink as ek vir daai stralende gesiggies moes sê hulle hond is nou nie meer hulle hond nie. O wee, ek sou dit nie maak nie! Dis in my natuur om moeilikheid te vermy, maar as ek nou in die moeilikheid gaan wees, probeer ek maar altyd dinge so uitwerk dat dit óf by hulle, óf by die Minster is. Nooit beide nie. As ek daardie dag nee gesê het sou ek alleen gestaan het in my hoekie. So toe haal ek maar die kredietkaartjie uit want plastiek is mos geduldig. 
By die Animal Welfare League aangekom ontmoet ons toe ‘n Collie genaamd Honey. Sy lyk nes Lassie met lang goue hare en die skerp gesiggie. Die Minister het baie van haar gehou, ek het so effe teesinnig ingestem want, kom ons wees maar eerlik, Lassie is ‘n grensgeval as dit kom by die vraag van hond wees of nie hond wees nie. Die besluit word toe gelukkig vir ons gemaak. Sy het kennel cough opgedoen en moes ‘n week of drie in kwarantyn deurbring. Dis toe dat hulle ons aan Rex voorstel. Ons het baie gehou van die brak, maar sy naam moes verander. Jy noem mos nie jou hond “Rex” nie. Na vele voorstelle, in diepte besprekings, ernstige debatvoering en rondtes van eliminasie word Rex toe in ‘n roerende seremonie herdoop na “Koda”. 
Koda is ‘n Australian Kelpie, ‘n baie wakker en slim ras wat hier op die plase gebruik word as herdershonde, en defnitief 'n regte hond! Dis dieselfde tipe brak wat onlangs in die fliek Red Dog gespeel het, Koda is net ‘n swarter weergawe. ‘n Beter hond kon ons nie voor gevra het nie. Wanneer ek met hom speel, speel hy hard, maar met die korter mensies speel hy rustig. Hy  is ook 'n baie soet brak. Ongeag van hoe lekker sy kos ruik, sal hy nie begin eet voor ek nie sê hy kan nie. Hy lek wel sy lippe met oorgawe terwyl hy stip na sy kosbak staar. 
Koda soek altyd aandag net waar hy dit kan kry. As ek vir hom vra “Waar is jou been?” dan spring hy op en soek die werf deur en kom dan uiteindelik terug met so ‘n groot oranje plastiek been in sy bek met ogies wat blink en ‘n stert wat waai want oubaas gaan mos nou vir hom sy been gooi. Al wat beter as been-gooi is, is om te gaan stap. En as hy nou lekker moeg en warm gespeel of gestap is, dan spring hy in sy swembad om bietjie af te koel.Ons kan almal ‘n lessie of twee leer by hom – hy is altyd bly om ons te sien, en ek bedoel ALTYD! Hy is uitbundig opgewonde oor die geringste en gaan haal altyd sy been, maak nie saak of dit nou warm of koud, vroeg of laat is nie, en of hy moeg of uitgerus is nie. As daar nou een is wat met oorgawe leef is dit Koda! Veral as daar dalk ‘n verdwaalde voëltjie of kat op die werf dwaal, dan is dit oorgawe plus nog meer! 
So my liewe lesers, ontmoet vir Koda:
Koef af tydens ons stappie om die damReg vir aksie om sy been te gaan haalAl sy konsentrasie is op een punt gevestig...
Kat? Het jy gesê Kat? Waar?
Die lekkerste is om onder die water borrels deur sy neus te blaas.

To Facebook, or not to Facebook...

24 January 2012 11:17 11
...that is the question. I'm a recent Facebook convert. Well, relatively recent - I signed up on the 7th of January 2011 or there about. When standing around the barbeque fire, I was always the one professing adamantly, “Facebook? Nah, not for me!” But I must admit, since joining the Facebook bandwagon it has grown on me. I have reunited with many school friends who would otherwise have remained distant memories (and trust me, they are very happy because I know they missed me very much) or caught up more frequently with family when I probably would not have done so, were it not for Facebook. My friends count is currently standing at 143, quite modest really, when compared to some of my Facebook buddies with friend counts in excess of 500. I know, the definition of “friend” in the Facebook world is somewhat more liberal or more broadly defined when compared to my personal definition. 
Be that as it may, Facebook has become a very powerful medium with which to reach masses of people. The corporate world here in Australia (and I would guess the rest of the world too, with the exception of maybe North Korea and Mongolia) have spotted the potential of this platform, as have our beloved politicians. The operative buzz words being “social media”. It’s simply too big a lure for them to ignore - the promise of reaching millions of potential customers or supporters. I’ve never had a real problem with this, if they can get some free advertising by convincing someone to “like” them, make friends or join their page, then good on them. After all, I’m doing the exact same thing on this blog (not that I’ve been super successful to date, so once you're done reading this riveting piece, why don't you look to the right and like this page? C’mon! You know you want to!). 
But can you take social media too far? The answer to this question came to me the other day while I was sitting on the loo, pondering… (as one does). While my eyes shifted in and out of focus I started to notice a pack of toilet rolls on the floor which we wisely purchased the day before (trust me, you don’t want to run out of your supply of white gold, but that’s a story for another day). Anyway, my eyes eventually focussed on a sticker on the pack of toilet rolls cordially inviting me to find them on Facebook, or follow them on Twitter. Say WHAT?? Now I’ll be the first one to admit that I like them very, very much, and that my level of appreciation grew by an order of magnitude that fateful day when we ran out. But to tell the whole world, or at least your whole personal Facebook world, that you like the “triple ply, extra soft and fluffy, will not scratch or chafe, lightly fragranced for your enjoyment” toilet paper? I don’t think so - there are some things you just simply don’t put on Facebook. 
(of course, publishing it on my blog is a totally different story…)2012-01-28 - Update: I never investigated their Facebook or Twitter pages any further, but my fellow blogger Michael Gorey did - read his excellent post on Toilet paper on Twitter and Facebook.
...dit is die vraag. Ek is 'n onlangse bekeerling tot die Facebook-ding. Wel, relatief onlangs - ek het iewers in Januarie 2011 opgeteken, die 7de as ek reg onthou. Voor dit was ek altyd daardie persoon by die braaivleisvuur wat aangevoer het, "Facebook? Ag nee wat, dis nie vir my nie!” Maar ek moet erken, sedert ek by die Facebook brigade aangesluit het, het hierdie storie nogal gegroei aan my. Ek het baie van my ou skoolpelle opgespoor wat sonder Facebook waarskynlik nie sou gebeur nie (hulle is baie bly want hulle het blykbaar baie na my verlang), en ek vang nou meer gereeld op met my familie, iets wat ook sonder Facebook dalk nie so gereeld sou gebeur nie. Ek het sover 'n vriende telling van 143, redelik beskeie as jy dit vergelyk met die 500-plus vriende wat sekere van my Facebook maatjies het. Ek weet, die definisie van "friend" in Facebook is ietwat meer liberaal, of minstens meer omvattend as my persoonlike definisie daarvan. 
Dit daar gelaat, ons weet almal dat Facebook ontwikkel het in 'n besonder kragtige medium waardeur massas mense bereik kan word. Die korporatiewe wêreld hier in Australië (en ek sou dink die res van die wêreld ook, met die uitsondering dalk van Noord Korea en Mongolia) het hierdie potensiaal definitief raakgesien, asook natuurlik ons geliefde politikusse. Die operatiewe woorde hier is die sogenaamde “social media”. Dis 'n lokaas wat eenvoudig te groot is om te ignoreer - daardie belofte van ‘n kans om miljoene potensiële kopers of ondersteuners te bereik. Ek het nog nooit regtig 'n probleem hiermee gehad nie, as hulle 'n bietjie gratis advertensie kan kry deur iemand te oortuig om hulle te "like", of met hulle maatjies te maak, goed vir hulle. Ek doen immers dieselfde hier op my blog (nie dat ek regtig tot op hede super suksesvol was nie - jy kan gerus na jy hierdie boeiende blog gelees het op my "share this page" knoppie kliek! Toe, jy weet jy wil!) 
Maar kan mens hierdie “social media” ding te ver vat? Ek het die antwoord op hierdie vraag gekry toe ek 'n dag of drie terug op die porseleintrein gaan sit het, en met diep denke begin nadink het (soos mens nou maar maak as jy daar sit). Terwyl my oë in en uit fokus beweeg, word my aandag met die tyd gevestig op die pakkie toiletrolle wat op die vloer voor my lê, die resultaat van 'n wyse besluit die vorige dag om nog voorraad aan te koop (glo my, jy wil nie in 'n situasie wees waar jou voorraad wit goud klaar raak nie, maar dis 'n storie vir 'n ander dag). Terwyl ek so sit en die pakkie bekyk sien ek ‘n plakker wat ek nog nooit van tevore veel ag op geslaan het nie. Hierop word ek hartlik uitgenooi om die toiletrol-mense op Facebook te gaan opsoek, of hulle Twitter gesprekke te volg. Ekskuus??? Nee werklikwaar!! Ek sal die eerste wees om te erken dat ek baie, baie van hulle hou en dat my admirasie vir hulle eksponensieel gegroei na daardie noodlottige dag toe die papier klaar geraak het. Maar om aan die hele wêreld, of ten minste jou Facebook-wêreld, te verkondig dat jy die “triple ply, extra soft and fluffy, will not scratch or chafe, lightly fragranced for your enjoyment” toilet papier “like”? Ek dink nie so nie, daar is net sekere goed wat mens nie op Facebook sit nie. 
(natuurlik is dit ‘n totale ander storie om dit op my blog te publiseer…)2012-01-28 - Update: Ek het nooit verder gekom om te gaan kyk na hulle Facebook of Twitter blaaie nie, maar my mede blogger Michael Gorey het - gaan lees gerus sy uitstekende blog van Toilet paper on Twitter and Facebook.
“No brain, no pain”. That is what someone once told me. If that statement is true it must mean that I have a huge brain because believe me, not long ago I experienced pain thoroughly and completely. My regular readers (I do have regular readers, right?) will remember how I described the physical and mental torture which I had to endure. The misery and gnashing of teeth, the exhausting challenge and test of stamina and mental endurance, which is better known as the Australian Corporate Games 2011. It was difficult, but I believe it made a better person out of me. No really, I think it did. And so I sat the one day, reminiscing about that fateful day when I was suddenly brought back to reality by an email that appeared in my inbox with the subject “Tough Mudder Australia”. A subject line like that will always catch my attention, so I promptly opened the email and began to read. 
The email was sent to me by a colleague who thought it would be a splendid idea if we were to participate in the afore-mentioned challenge, with a link to a video clip that promised to tell me more (I have included the video at the bottom of this post for those of you who want to have a look for yourself). I opened the link and observed the spectacle. If I though the Corporate Games was tough I was in for a surprise. In this “race” you try to get as close to death as you can without actually kicking the bucket, or at least that appears to be the general idea. Where the Corporate Games was 5km, this one was 20. The Corporate Games run had a clean and level path around a picturesque lake with cute little duckies and swans. With this challenge you had to traverse mud pools, dive into ice cold water, overcome obstacles, crawl through muddy tunnels, climb up ropes and jump fall off the structure on the other side, run through electrical wires, jump through tyres, swim through rivers and run between fires and over coals. Nice... 
Why, I ask you, would a healthy, sane person do something like that? Apparently it’s simply to be able to say “I DID it!”. I watched all of this and then asked myself, “Was this a bad idea? Yep, without a doubt! Would I survive something like that? Certainly not! Would I be crazy to try it? Absolutely! Would any person with half a brain attempt something like this? Definitely not! Am I going to do it? You bet I am!” Don't ask my why, but I simply have to try this! Now I know I’m not exactly a picture of fitness so this will now doubt be a great challenge for me, but one which I will gladly accept. 
So what is this “Tough Mudder” all about? In short, it's a charity event to raise funds for Legacy, an organisation that assists war veterans and their families, hence the theme. I borrowed a little from the Tough Mudder website because they sum it up nicely: 
“Tough Mudder events are hardcore 20 km-long obstacle courses designed by British Special Forces to test your all around strength, stamina, mental grit, and camaraderie. With the most innovative courses and half a million inspiring participants, Tough Mudder is the premier adventure challenge series in the world”. 
Now doesn't that sound like a great challenge? 
Tough Mudder is different from other races in that they don’t focus on a winner. No, the challenge is against yourself, to test your own endurance and perseverance. Here are a few Q&A questions from their website: 
Will Tough Mudder be cancelled if there is bad weather? 
Tough Mudder events will happen regardless of the weather conditions. (who’s afraid of a little hale or snow??) 
What is the average finishing time? 
The average Tough Mudder will complete the course in around three hours. (I suspect that after I have completed the course, they may adjust that average upwards a little to 4 or 5 hours, assuming I don’t die trying) 
Can I skip an obstacle? 
Tough Mudder is not supposed to be about getting a faster time than your mate, so it’s fine by us if you want to skip an obstacle. The way we see it, you are there to have fun (uhm... fun?) and get a real sense of achievement at the end. If you think a particular obstacle isn’t going to do this for you, just go round it – no shame there (thank goodness!). The marshalls that you will see at each obstacle are there for safety reasons, not to make you do something you don’t want to do. However, if you are skipping an obstacle just to improve your time, then we think you are only cheating yourself. You paid to do the course – why not actually do it? Obviously, though, for some who participate there is a real element of competition involved in the event, so we do say that to qualify for a winners’s prize or for the World’s Toughest Mudder competition you must have completed all the obstacles. 
How does Tough Mudder punish cheaters? 
Tough Mudders do not cheat. (so it's plan B for me then...) 
Do I really get one beer? 
Yes. The registration fee includes one beer for participants, which can be collected after the conclusion of the event. (Only one?? I was hoping for at least two, but I would have to make do with one. Without a beer though, I would have thought twice before committing to this!) 
What is the Tough Mullet and Mohawk Competition? 
We recognize that the toughest people aren’t always the fastest or most athletic (I think they may be referring to me here). One way of celebrating this is the Tough Mullet and Mohawk Competition. Participants can either arrive with a mullet (I know I live in Queensland, but no, definitely not!), Mohawk (possibly...), or take advantage of the free head shave. Those with the best mullets and mohawks will be invited to take to the stage, and prizes will be awarded to the top five mullets or mohawks. (I’m sure the Minister of Finances and Home Affairs will support me in this, won’t you lovey? ...You will, right?? ...Lovey?) 
Every athlete worth his salt has a pledge, or so I understand. So too the Touch Mudders. Their pledge is as follows: 
I understand that Tough Mudder is not a race but a challenge (suits me just fine! I have never ended up within the first ten finishers of any race before anyway)
I put teamwork and camaraderie before my course time (No problem, see point number 1)
I do not whine – kids whine (oh no, you don’t understand, not in my house they don’t! But I get the point.)
I help my fellow Mudders complete the course (I would just be thankful if someone would help me finish the course!)
I overcome all fears. (Careful? maybe... Slow? certainly! But afraid? NEVER!!)
The Melbourne Touch Mudder happens this year in March, with the Sydney event scheduled for September. Unfortunately the Brisbane Mudder is only planned for 2013. Maybe it’s a good thing, that way I have some time get rid of the extra weight and try to achieve a measure of fitness. I will therefore now have to focus on starting some form of exercise routine to get fit, something that may well be a greater challenge than the Mudder itself! But you know what they also say, “No pain, no gain!”
So, who's in this with me??
Here are a few pics that I borrowed from the Tough Mudder website (toughmudder.com.au), just for some inspiration:
“No brain, no pain”. Dis wat iemand een maal vir my gesê het. As dit waar is, beteken dit seker ek het baie verstand want glo my, daar was ‘n tyd nie so lank terug nie wat ek pyn deeglik en totaal ervaar het. My gereelde lesers (daar is van julle wat gereeld kom lees, né?) sal onthou hoe ek die fisiese en psigiese marteling beskryf het wat ek onlangs moes deurmaak. Daardie ellende en gekners van tande, die uitputtende uitdaging en toets van stamina en uithouvermoë, wat oor die algemeen bekend staan as die Australian Corporate Games 2011. Dit was erg, maar ek glo dit het ‘n beter mens van my gemaak. Nee, regtig, ek go dit het. So sit ek die ander dag en dink weer terug aan daardie skouspel toe ek skielik tot die realiteit terugkeer na ‘n e-possie met die opskrif “Tough Mudder Australia” op my skerm opduik. Daardie opskriffie trek toe my aandag en ek moes natuurlik ondersoek instel. 
Die e-possie was aan my gestuur deur ‘n kollega wat gedink het dit sou ‘n knap idee wees as ons daaraan sou deelneem, met ‘n link na ‘n video clip wat meer vir my sou vertel (die video is hieronder aangeheg vir diegene wat nadere ondersoek wil instel). Ek maak toe die link oop en beloer die spulletjie. As ek gedink het die Corporate Games was erg, was ek in vir ‘n verassing. Die algemene idee van hierdie “wedloop” (of so lyk dit ten minste vir my) is dat jy jouself druk om so naby aan die dood te kom as wat jy kan, sonder om werklik die emmer te skop. Waar Corporate Games 5km was, is hierdie een 20. Die Corporate Games wedloop het bestaan uit ‘n skoon en gelyke paadjie om ‘n prentjiemooi dam met oulike eendjies en swane, hierdie roete lei jou deur modderpoele, moet jy by yskoue water induik, oor hindernisse kom, deur tonnels in die modder kruip, by toue opklim en by stellasies af spring val, deur elektriese drade hardloop, oor buitebande spring, deur riviere swem en tussen vure en oor warm kole hardloop. Nice...Hoekom, vra ek jou, sou ‘n gesonde mens wat by sy volle bewussyn is, so iets wou doen? Blykbaar net om bloot te kan sê, “Ek het dit GEDOEN!”. Ek bekyk die spulletjie so en vra myself, “Was dit ‘n slegte idee? Definitief! Sou ek dit oorleef?  Definitief nie! Sal ek mal wees om dit aan te durf? Absoluut! Sal enige persoon, met ‘n halwe verstand so iets aanpak? Sekerlik nie! Gaan ek dit doen? Verseker!” Hoekom? Ek weet nie, ek moet dit net doen. Nou ek weet ek's nie juis ‘n prentjie van fiksheid nie so dit sal, om die minste te sê, ‘n groot uitdaging wees, maar een wat ek met alle ywer gaan aanpak. 
So waaroor gaan hierdie “Tough Mudder” nou eintlik? Hoekom is daar mense, wat klaarblyklik nie totaal en al van hulle sinne beroof is nie, wat dit doen? In kort, dit is ‘n fondsinsamelings inisiatief tot voordeel van Legacy, ‘n organisasie wat hulp verleen aan oorlogsveterane en hulle families, vandaar die tema van die wedloop. Ek het so bietjie by die Tough Mudder webwerf af gaan leen, hulle som dit mooi op: 
“Tough Mudder events are hardcore 20 km-long obstacle courses designed by British Special Forces to test your all around strength, stamina, mental grit, and camaraderie. With the most innovative courses and half a million inspiring participants, Tough Mudder is the premier adventure challenge series in the world”. 
Klink dit nou nie vir jou na ‘n lekker uitdaging nie? 
Anders as ander wedlope word daar nie ‘n groot fokus geplaas op wie wen nie en word daar nie plekke toegeken nie. Nee, hierdie wedloop is teen jouself, om jou eie deursettingsvermoë te toets. Hier is ‘n paar Q&A vragies wat op hulle webwerf verskyn: 
Will Tough Mudder be cancelled if there is bad weather? 
Tough Mudder events will happen regardless of the weather conditions. (die manne en anties in hulle help-my-sterk-lyk hempies is mos nie bang vir bietjie hael of sneeu nie?) 
What is the average finishing time? 
The average Tough Mudder will complete the course in around three hours. (ek vermoed dat daardie gemiddelde tyd 'n bietjie aangepas sal word na ek die wedloop voltooi het, seker na so 4 of 5 ure - dis nou as ek nie vroeër dood neerslaan nie) 
Can I skip an obstacle? 
Tough Mudder is not supposed to be about getting a faster time than your mate, so it’s fine by us if you want to skip an obstacle. The way we see it, you are there to have fun (uhm... fun??) and get a real sense of achievement at the end. If you think a particular obstacle isn’t going to do this for you, just go round it – no shame there (dankie tog!). The marshalls that you will see at each obstacle are there for safety reasons, not to make you do something you don’t want to do. However, if you are skipping an obstacle just to improve your time, then we think you are only cheating yourself. You paid to do the course – why not actually do it? Obviously, though, for some who participate there is a real element of competition involved in the event, so we do say that to qualify for a winners’s prize or for the World’s Toughest Mudder competition you must have completed all the obstacles. 
How does Tough Mudder punish cheaters? 
Tough Mudders do not cheat. (dis goed julle sê my, so dan werk ek maar op plan B...) 
Do I really get one beer? 
Yes. The registration fee includes one beer for participants, which can be collected after the conclusion of the event. (Net een?? Ek het gehoop vir ten minste twee, maar een sal seker die ding moet doen. Sonder die biertjie sou ek dalk twee maal gedink het voor ek hiervoor ingestem het!) 
What is the Tough Mullet and Mohawk Competition? 
We recognize that the toughest people aren’t always the fastest or most athletic (ek dink hulle mag dalk hier na my verwys). One way of celebrating this is the Tough Mullet and Mohawk Competition. Participants can either arrive with a mullet (ek bly nou wel in Queensland, maar nee, beslis nie!), Mohawk (moontlik...), or take advantage of the free head shave. Those with the best mullets and mohawks will be invited to take to the stage, and prizes will be awarded to the top five mullets or mohawks. (ek is seker die Minister van Finansies en Huishoudelike Sake sal my ondersteun hierin…jy sal liefie, né?...Sal jy? ...Liefie?) 
Enige atleet wat sy sout werd is, so verstaan ek, het ‘n eed. So ook die sogenaamde Tough Mudders. Hulle eed is as volg: 
I understand that Tough Mudder is not a race but a challenge (pas my goed want ek het nog nooit in enige wedloop onder die eerste tien geëindig nie)I put teamwork and camaraderie before my course time (Geen probleem, sien punt 1) I do not whine – kids whine (o nee, julle verstaan nie - nie in my huis nie! Maar ek kry die idee.) I help my fellow Mudders complete the course (ek sal maar net te bly wees as hulle my sal help!) I overcome all fears. (Versigtig? dalk... Stadig? beslis! Maar bang? NOOIT!!) 
Touch Mudder vind hierdie jaar Maartmaand in Melbourne plaas, en Septembermaand in Sydney. Ongelukkig is die eerste Brisbane Mudder eers in 2013. Dis dalk goed so, gee my kans om van die oortollige vetjies ontslae te raak en ‘n mate van fiksheid te probeer behaal. Ek sal dus die dik lyf aan die oefen moet begin kry, iets wat dalk ‘n groter uitdaging sal wees as die wedloop self! Of hoe sê hulle ook? “No pain, no gain!”So, wie kom saam met my??
Hier is 'n paar kiekies wat ek by die Tough Mudder webwerfie (toughmudder.com.au) gaan leen het, net vir bietjie meer inspirasie: